The Christmas I Sold My Soul to Bimart for $79.99

Christmas is, without a doubt, the most wonderful time of the year. Today, I got to use the leafblower indoors (more on that momentarily) and salvage fresh cypress greens (with berries!!) from a fallen tree across the street.

We had some wet, heavy snow last night and awoke to this festive scene...

The snow took out some branches across the street (only one at our house) and I put on my sweet waterproof Sorels to go splash through three inches of slush and drag a few armloads of wet branches back to the garage. Waterproof footwear makes me feel like I have superpowers. I should maybe shoot higher for my superpower abilities, but it's really pretty great walking through slush and puddles with dry feet.

Yesterday, I acquired not one but free two large birch logs from a Christmas tree lot that we didn't even buy a tree from! (Not pictured...yet.) Best time of the year.

This shall also forever be known as the year that I sold out and bought a fake tree, and then spent the last 24 hours since that purchase wondering why it took me so long to actually do it. I have pine cubes for my wax warmer and a fake tree, and it is fantastic. It's one of those "real feel" ones and looks pretty solid, even to my rather particular eye.

Ok, so, the freshly scavenged greens. I made this ...trough... from scrap wood a couple of years ago when we lived in Bend. Thought it'd look nice on the dining room table as a centerpiece, and (bonus) it smells good too. Which is perfect, because it helps sneak the fake tree by.

 LOOK at all these berries! So festive. If it was any more festive, nobody could handle it. It will not be residing on the kitchen counter all season. That was just to make sure it wasn't leaking.

But here at Casa McShoe, it's about to get EVEN MORE FESTIVE. You may recall me earlier in the post stating that I had occasion to use the leafblower inside. Technically it was sort of inside, with the blowy end pointed out the front door. We have a real tree sitting in a holder on the front porch, drying off so it could come in. It was a bit soggy from the weather last night. So it's been sitting there all day as it rains, which means the air is not conducive to evaporation.

I began to wonder, is there a better way to get the tree dry? Yes, yes, there is. It is sitting in my garage right now. And as I stood in my doorway at dusk as the neighbor walked by, staring at me as I blew dead needles and water everywhere, I thought to myself, is there a more fun way to get the tree dry? And we all know the answer to this: no, there definitely is not. So we will be decorating our dry Christmas tree in short order.

But wait, there's still more Christmas!

Normally I am not terribly into displaying random stuff on top of cabinets in kitchens. Or any stuff. But it's Christmas and I just bought a fake tree, so there are no rules anymore.

 There's even kitchy americana, which is normally strictly prohibited.

 Oh, look, more fragrant and festive fresh greens.

 Here's the rest of the kitchen, btw. Picture rail is finished and all but one piece of art is in place, though it's seasonally rearranged to accommodate the snowy pine swag thing on the right. I looove it.

 Here's a close-up on the arrangement on the table. I think it still needs a little work. Kind of heavy on the left and right, and it's reminding me a bit of Maleficent.

It's possible the resemblance is a little more in my head, but nonetheless, Maleficent is not very festive.

Wait, did another picture of my fake tree sneak in here? Oh, well...

A little cheer here...(minus the dead plant. That was an experiment that didn't go as I'd hoped.)

A LOT of cheer there, and there isn't even a tree in there yet!

And lastly, this flannel ribbon that I am pretty jazzed to use on gifts (and then surreptitiously steal and take home to use again for next year when the receiver of the gift isn't watching. I am coming to accept that I might actually be an old lady.)

MERRY CHRISTMAS, YOU FILTHY ANIMALS!!

Update...

Here's the Christmas tree (the night before we took it down). It was a grand fir and it smelled amazing.